Friday, December 12, 2014

Adoption: They Didn't Get to Play

They didn’t get to play very much. Maybe they didn’t get to play at all.

When we first brought them home they could not speak a word of English but the language barrier was not the reason why they didn’t “play”.  For so long they were more concerned with scrounging for food and securing a place to sleep at night than they were about toys and games. Having clothing to wear was a higher priority than fun and silliness. They did not have shoes nor did they have a safe haven they could call home. This is part of their early childhood reality that brought them to the place of adoption.

It has been 4 years since they have been in our family. We try to go about life as any other family would: busy, chasing, schedules to keep. Despite how long we have been together, there are still surprising defining moments of overwhelming gratitude. Both of my adopted children struggle immensely at school with academics. My son comes home exhausted every day and as we pull out his homework he asks, “Can I just play?” Maybe he is attempting to avoid his work and is trying to get out of it. But perhaps he is trying to make up for the lost years, regaining the days he was not given the freedom to just be a child.  


He has learned to play. He watched other children and followed their lead. Now he laughs and giggles and loves the opportunity to build. He constructs and creates imaginary places, stories and adventures. He may not recognize it but he is given the pleasure of just being a kid. Although he still has to do his homework, I recognize the privilege as his mom of being able to tell him, “Ok. Now go and play!” 

Oh, what a gift it is. 
Photo: Courtesy of my son's imagination & a passion to wage wars with little green army men.